Happy New Year! Vaya Con Dios

I should begin by describing the relatively contentious relationship I have always had with New Years. For some reason, my plans just never work out. Here's a rundown of the last 5:

1. I extended a ticket to stay in NYC in hopes of going to a cool party. When I arrived at said party with two very loved up married couples [one couple was so loved up they had each other's names tattooed on their chests in very big letters which to me represents both a passion and a certainty that is pretty unique and special], I realized I was the only straight, single women in attendance. I had arrived at a party of the oldest group of homosexual men I had ever seen [and remember I am not a stranger to gay bars]. A man danced passed me in salmon pants who I'm pretty sure was pushing 80. Needless to say, I failed to find myself a New Year's kiss that evening.

2. I went to a party at my friends house full of hot Jamaican dudes. However, all of the hot Jamaican dudes were spoken for and sat in a room drinking rum and playing Dominoes. All of their wives and ladyfriends stayed in the kitchen cooking and discussing recipes. Since I can drink rum all right, but possess no talent for cooking it wasn't really my kind of party.

3. I went to see my identical twins roommates 80's cover band play with some friends before I realized that they secretly,or not so secretly, hated me because I had asked them not to do some things I considered offensive, gross, and definitely not suitable for a Sunday in the living room. At the end of the night, one of my best friends was going through a pretty heartbreaking time and left for Port Authority at about 3 am and turned off her phone. Being a little neurotic at times, I was pretty convinced she had been kidnapped by bandits. Shockingly, she wasn't.

4. I went out in Brooklyn and nobody seemed that into it. I went to a show at Death By Audio which is a warehouse space and realized that I had reached an age where I have very strong feelings about T.P. I learned that I want T.P. available AT ALL TIMES and that this would probably prohibit me from really enjoying any shows at Death By Audio and most other alternative venues filled with 19 year old art students. I ended up at a bar I don't like where the breathtakingly handsome drummer from one of my favorite bands walked in. This sort of bummed me out. He had just recorded with Bowie. Shouldn't he know of some hip loft party and not be at the same lame bar I was at? I hypothesized that he was, like myself, was lured there by the W.T. inspired snacks. There is no denying that cheeseballs and Frito Pie are in fact crazy delicious.

5. Last year, I decided to stop trying to go out and find a good time. Lady luck just never seems to be on my side at the end of the year. My friend Amabile invited me over for dinner and we ate good food and drank nice wine and watched the ball drop with her friend Tammy Jo. It was mellow and nice and proved to be one of my best New Years ever. I liked both the bad ass view of the Marcy Projects from Amabile's loft and the end of trying to chase the dragon. However, I would be lying if I said I wasn't a little concerned when I found myself eating a pint of Ben and Jerry's in my bed solo at 1am while watching the movie Extract. Extract, was pretty funny and I do love Jason Bateman [although not nearly as much as Keanu Reeves], but it seemed like a potentially problematic theme with which to start the new year.

This brings me to this New Years. Since I am in Southern Australia, I decided to dedicate the last day of 2010 to Patrick Swayze. I sorta stole the idea from Yvette, my tour guide of the Yarra Valley. During the tour, she told me that every year on March 17th, she has St. Patrick Swayze Day and watches her favorite Patrick Swayze movies [She does not watch Dirty Dancing because she feels the role is too soft and not a true Swayze film. She prefers Roadhouse. I have to agree with her there. It's pretty hard to not love a movie about a bouncer at a super violent Honky Tonk bar who is also a philosopher and a Tai Chi Master].

While I do love Roadhouse and The Outsiders, my favorite Patrick Swayze movie is by far Point Break. This film tells the story of a young FBI agent, Johnny Utah who has gone undercover to take down a band of bank robbing surfers who finance their trips around the world in search of the ultimate waves through a life of crime while wearing masks of former US presidents. If it sounds ridiculous, that's because it is. It is also completely amazing and hands down one of my favorite movies of all time.

Now, it also stars Keanu, my number one celebrity crush ever since I first watched Bill and Ted's Excellent Adventure. Point Break solidified my deep and special love for Keanu. This love is still going strong. My friends spotted him at a documentary in LA still hanging out with Alex Winter [his co-star in Bill and Ted's] which made me love him even more. How can you not love a movie star who has an old school BFF? I get a little bummed when I see pictures of him looking all sad on my favorite celebrity gossip blog, DListed. When my friend told me he had an office near hers in NYC and she always saw him in the kitchen buttering bagels and looked blue, I cursed the fact that I was all the way in Indonesia. If I could just suddenly show up one day and happen to bump into him, maybe I could cheer him up. I mean, Matt Damon married his bartender, right?

Despite my love for Keanu, I think it is safe to say that Point Break really belongs to The Swayze. Yes, Johnny Utah is gorgeous and undergoes a spiritual awakening through the magic of surfing and true love in the form of Lori Petty a feisty surfer girl, but it's really Bodhi who steals the show. Johnny Utah just can't really compete with the surfer, bank robber, and philosopher [a Swayze theme I guess] who is the film's Bodhitsattva. When he gives the speech about the dead souls in their metal coffins [all the people on their way to work in their cars], I really felt it and totally got where he was coming from. I also would like to experience 100% Pure Adrenalin. Who on earth wouldn't? Therefore, I decided to spend the last day of 2010 going to the site of the final scene of Point Break, Bell's Beach. It's where Johnny has finally caught up with Bodhi for their final showdown. Instead of taking him in, he lets him surf the giant and fatal wave of the 50 year storm. Bodhi rides his last wave and disappears into the ocean, living by his own rules until the very end.

I have to be honest. We didn't make it all the way to Bell's Beach due to extreme heat, confusing public transportation, and the fact that my friend Alisa and I were dressed more like we were ready to go to a Nirvana concert and less like we were ready to spend time frolicking in the surf. However, we got very, very close. In addition to this, we went to the Surf Museum and I kept both Partick and Bodhi in my thoughts all day long. I also bought a Bell's Beach beanie which I will probably not be able to wear in Indonesia, but I really, really love.

Very, Very close to Bell's Beach

Me trying to learn how to Hang Loose at The Surf Museum

Alisa learning about famous surfers

I decided to end my Partick Swayze/Goodbye 2010 Day with a Happy New Years Bikram Yoga Class. I figured it was the best way to make sure that 2011 marks the day that my Hippy Card comes in mail despite my love of Punk Rock, sarcasm, and black clothing. I think it's possible as long as I don't tell anyone how I really feel about Phish. I'm not sure why yoga works. The Doubting Thomas in me says that it only works because I become exhausted and slightly confused after stretching my body in 110 degree heat for 90 minutes which makes me feel more relaxed and less agrivated. However, I don't know everything. Maybe I really am freeing my mind and unlocking my potential, man! Either way, I figured it was a good way to clear my head and get ready for the New Year.

I decided to splurge on the more expensive brand of Coconut Water because it was made by a company called Nudie. I rightly assumed that this would be my sole chance to inject a little sexy into my New Year festivities.

I left the yoga studio and figured these words were not the worst ones to read right before I said good bye to 2010. I then met Alisa and Noreen for some wine and cheese to celebrate the New Year. I couldn't put on any make up because my face was way too red, but I was much too mellow from class and spending all day in the hot sun to care. At midnight Alisa's phone rang and it was my mom calling to wish me a Happy New Year [I miss you, too]. All in all, it was a New Years well spent. So far, my Jesus Year is proving to be pretty good. Hey mom, You just might have been right about 33.

Happy New Year!

Namaste, dudes!

xoxoxo